I posted this Discovery on 19 January 2008 “Humans are social beings, yet we are constantly sh...

Posted by alma on 26.01.2008

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Posted by Noura on 23.01.2008

Fear of rejection is what leads us to seek acceptance, but since acceptance in its true form is hard to come by, we choose to be social because that can be translated into acceptance, of a different form, but yet it works to shelter us from rejection,, your are essentialy forming a defence mechanisim, i.e. I cant be rejected by one person when I am associated to a hundered persons,,

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Posted by Shalabieh on 23.01.2008

its all about self perception we view ourselves a certain way and when someone rejects us that comes into conflict with those perceptions.

There is something called a self limiting belief. These are things we belive such as life should be fair, or everyone should like me. When we are rejected for whatever reason something we belive about ourselves is being challenged. I am attractive to everyone, I am smart and professional so I shoudl get the job.

My two cents worth... on to read the postings below.

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Posted by razano on 23.01.2008

When rejection happens then someone somewhere doesn't want to give you what you want, and we all want to get what we want. I think people need acceptance to feel validated as beings.

Codependency needs to be controlled, we need to know that we can survive by our selves, control issue?? I don' think its us being lazy. It just that it takes time to get to know people, trust them know their intentions and their real motivations before we open up.

People in general are comfortable more with social ones, so yes the more you know people the more you are validated to be worthy of other's attention. Bugs me too.

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Posted by Noura on 22.01.2008

Well there is one thing that bugs me, it seems to me that people in general want to get to know others, infact they judge each other on how vast their social network is, the more people you know the more in the "IN CROWD" you are, especialy here in Amman, It also workes on different levels: it could be how many contacts you have on your facebook, how many numbers you have saved in your phone book, how many people say hi to you or recognise you while shopping at city mall, how many hellos you get sitting in bluefig, how many eid visits on the holiday, how many people can you manage to invite to a wedding, it just goes on and on,,,

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Posted by alma on 22.01.2008

You are absolutely right- most of the way we behave is a response and part of our socialization. But I have lived in different parts of the world and I am observing that regardless of society, generally people tend to be protective of their own selves, concerned with what others say about them, and how they are perceived by others. I am trying to understand why is it that our concern of others’ opinions of us limits our communications with them- wouldn’t we want to talk to as many people as we can so as to tell them who we are, thus avoiding misconceptions of ourselves?

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Posted by Noura on 22.01.2008

I feel your being a bit harsh and way too gloomy. In my opinion the society dictates how a person acts/reacts towards other people, especially the environment they grew up in (family, friends, order in family, class,,,). So I can see how this translates to what you are saying, after all we are a judgemental society, with these values as guidlines: What people think of you matters, Impressing others comes first, Money means respect, If embaressed cover it up (hushhush).

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